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Funny Quotes About Drinking
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58 Funny quotes tagged with Drinking.
QUOTES
Dear alcohol, We had a deal where you would make me funnier, smarter, and a better dancer... I saw the video... we need to talk.
Unknown
311 Likes
Being Drunk quotes
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Something about today makes me want to be hungover tomorrow...
Unknown
44 Likes
Funny quotes
Drinking quotes
I snuck a bunch of booze into work today using my stomach...
Unknown
11 Likes
Funny quotes
Drinking quotes
I buy store-brand groceries so I can afford top-shelf booze.
Unknown
11 Likes
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Drinking quotes
It's not drinking on the job if you weren't planning to do any work.
Unknown
20 Likes
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Let's drink on the beach until we're no longer ashamed to show our bodies on the beach.
Unknown
46 Likes
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Technically, you're not drinking alone if your kids are home.
Unknown
32 Likes
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Your knowledge of wine is almost as impressive as your use of it to disguise your alcoholism.
Unknown
25 Likes
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Friday is the beginning of my liver's workweek.
Unknown
110 Likes
Funny quotes
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If you ever see me drinking a Bud Lite Lime, I have been kidnapped and am trying to signal you.
Unknown
26 Likes
Funny quotes
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The most expensive part of having kids is all the wine you have to drink.
Unknown
8 Likes
Funny quotes
Drinking quotes
I'm worried we're not saving enough for our retirement alcohol.
Unknown
10 Likes
Funny quotes
Drinking quotes
Pain makes you stronger. Tears make you braver. Heartbreak makes you wiser. And vodka makes you not remember any of that crap.
Unknown
338 Likes
Pain quotes
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I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.
Ritu Ghatourey
65 Likes
Drinking quotes
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Mom says 'Alcohol is your enemy'... Jesus says 'Love your enemy.'
Unknown
163 Likes
Funny quotes
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I like my women like I like my weekend - short, filled with liquor and gone by Monday.
Unknown
393 Likes
Funny quotes
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My doctor told me to watch my drinking, so now I drink in front of a mirror.
Unknown
124 Likes
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If alcohol kills millions of brain cells, how come it never killed the ones that made me want to drink?
Unknown
108 Likes
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When I drink alcohol...everyone says I'm alcoholic but When I drink Fanta...no one says I'm fantastic...
Unknown
132 Likes
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It's Saturday. The toughest decision you need to make is bottle or draft.
Unknown
59 Likes
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