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Ryanswainofficial Quotes & Sayings
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IQ Score: 2450
Total quotes: 23
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My penis should make me breakfast on morning. It is always up before I am.
Unknown
0 Likes
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I tantalise, you tease, you take I please. My body, you bind, my hands, entwined. I kneel, you stand I listen, you command. Im safe, with you, with me, youre true. We love, we lust we honour, we trust. Our life, our time Im yours, youre mine.
Ryan Swain
1 Likes
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What is 2.5 inches long and can satisfy a woman every-time? A credit card.
Unknown
0 Likes
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People who strive for popularity tend to lack the strength inside to be themselves.
Unknown
123 Likes
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Manners cost you nothing but ignorance will cost you everything.
Ryan Swain
45 Likes
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No woman will ever be truly satisfied on Valentines day because no man has a chocolate penis wrapped in money that ejaculates diamonds.
Unknown
353 Likes
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Are we celebrating the fact that Guy Fawkes got caught trying to blow up parliament or he tried to have a go at doing it?
Unknown
0 Likes
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Robert Pattinson must be the only guy in the world who enjoys his girlfriend being on her period.
Unknown
75 Likes
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This global recession has had a detrimental effect on my sex life. It's ages since I've been able to afford it.
Unknown
3 Likes
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I've been invited to a Halloween party tonight in America. To scare all the Yanks, I'm going as low-fat food!
Unknown
2 Likes
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Halloween: Is one night of the year when all households save the most on their electricity bill.
Unknown
1 Likes
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What's worse than a bull in a china shop? A hedgehog in a condom factory.
Unknown
14 Likes
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I got thrown out of my local bookshop for moving the Caution - Wet Floor sign and placing it next to the Fifty Shades of Grey shelf.
Unknown
0 Likes
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Halloween is getting stupid, hardly anyone dresses up as something scary & all the ladies go out looking like sluts. I guess it's the only night of the year they can do this without having their motives questioned.
Unknown
45 Likes
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Earlier I received a phone call from a PPI Telemarketer. So I told my 3 year old son that Santa Claus was on the phone. Their conversation has been going on for hours.
Unknown
0 Likes
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I'm not saying my ex-girlfriend is a slut I am just saying if everyone's cock had wings she'd be a airport.
Unknown
619 Likes
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Follow your heart and listen to your instincts because we all have them for a reason.
Ryan Swain
28 Likes
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Why don't Jehovah's Witnesses like Halloween? Because they cant handle the competition.
Unknown
44 Likes
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I haven't had sex in so long I am considering becoming a born again virgin.
Ryan Swain
157 Likes
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It is a human necessity no matter how bad life gets or dinghy a place can be to find the beauty inside of it. If you can do this, you can accomplish anything that life will throw at you.
Ryan Swain
2 Likes
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