Unknown Funny Facebook Status Quotes & Sayings


I want to make a Facebook account and the name will be Nobody so when I see stupid crap people post, I can Like it. And it will say Nobody Likes This.
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Suggest Revision: I want to make a Facebook account and the name will be Nobody so when I see stupid crap people post, I can Like it. And it will say Nobody Likes This.
 
Facebook is like jail, you sit around and waste time, write on walls, and get poked by people you don't know.
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Suggest Revision: Facebook is like jail, you sit around and waste time, write on walls, and get poked by people you don't know.
 
The teacher asks Timmy
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Suggest Revision: The teacher asks Timmy
 
If you're talking behind my back, you're in a good position to kiss my ass!
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Suggest Revision: If you're talking behind my back, you're in a good position to kiss my ass!
 
Drunk people run stop signs, high people wait for them to turn green.
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Suggest Revision: Drunk people run stop signs, high people wait for them to turn green.
 
Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it's wide use three fingers, make sure it's wet and rub up and down. Yep that's how you wash a cup.
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Suggest Revision: Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it's wide use three fingers, make sure it's wet and rub up and down. Yep that's how you wash a cup.
 
Wife: honey I want you to whisper dirty things in my ear! Husband: kitchen, living room, dinning room, patio
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Suggest Revision: Wife: honey I want you to whisper dirty things in my ear! Husband: kitchen, living room, dinning room, patio
 
...condom says to the tampon,
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Suggest Revision: ...condom says to the tampon,
 
In the past, when you were angry with someone you fought them. Now you just delete them off Facebook. That'll teach 'em to fuck with you.
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Suggest Revision: In the past, when you were angry with someone you fought them. Now you just delete them off Facebook. That'll teach 'em to fuck with you.
 
Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Never mind, it's too long.
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 Unknown quotes 
Suggest Revision: Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Never mind, it's too long.
 
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Friday, May 24
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