Rita Rudner Quotes & Sayings

Below are more quotes by Rita Rudner.

You know the oxygen masks on airplanes ? I don't think there's really any oxygen. I think they're just to muffle the screams.

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Rita Rudner quotes

Dark quotes Humor quotes

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Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside.

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I don't think jogging is healthy, especially morning jogging. If morning joggers knew how tempting they looked to morning motorists, they would stay home and do sit-ups.

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Rita Rudner quotes

Funny quotes Running quotes

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Halloween was confusing. All my life my parents said, "Never take candy from strangers." And then they dressed me up and said, "Go beg for it." I didnt know what to do! Id knock on peoples doors and go, "Trick or treat." "No thank you."

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Rita Rudner quotes

Funny quotes Halloween quotes

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Love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

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Rita Rudner quotes

Funny quotes Wedding quotes

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Rita Rudner quotes

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Quotes by Rita Rudner

Featured Quote: "Its funny how sometimes the people you'd take a bullet for, are the ones behind the trigger."

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New Updates! (5/22/2013) We've been working really hard on completing our new design and adding more member features. Once this is complete in the coming weeks there will be a lot more quotes by Rita Rudner and other authors. We've also changed the sorting on the site so you now see the latest Rita Rudner quotes first. Our goal is to have the best Rita Rudner quotes on the web!