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I never use the little twist ties to close a bag of bread...I just spin the bag and tuck it under the loaf of bread.
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Sunglasses allow an individual to stare at people without them knowing. It is Facebook in real life.
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Okay mom...you know I love you...but I can't accept your friend request on Facebook.
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Are you free tomorrow? No, Im fu..ing expensive.
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I want to make a Facebook account and the name will be Nobody so when I see stupid crap people post, I can Like it. And it will say Nobody Likes This.
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Being popular on Facebook is like sitting at the cool table in the cafeteria at a mental hospital.
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Facebook is like a relationship: Faithful on your wall, but cheating in their inbox...
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Deleting your Facebook is like running away from home. You're only doing it for attention and you'll be back in a day.
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Facebook is that insecure chick that keeps changing her hairstyle &/or color until she finally loses her mind and shaves it & scares everyone.
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If your girlfriend claims that she never looks at your Facebook profile; Try changing your status to 'Single' and wait 3-5 minutes...
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