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The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.
Will Rogers
147 Likes
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147 Comments
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Suppose the world were only one of God's jokes, would you work any the less to make it a good joke instead of a bad one?
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New opinions often appear first as jokes and fancies, then as blasphemies and treason, then as questions open to discussion, and finally as established truths.
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Our subconscious minds have no sense of humor, play no jokes and cannot tell the difference between reality and an imagined thought or image. What we continually think about eventually will manifest in our lives.
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I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
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My father taught me to work; he did not teach me to love it. I never did like to work, and I don't deny it. I'd rather read, tell stories, crack jokes, talk, laugh - anything but work.
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So I said, 'Where do you want to go for your anniversary?' She said: 'I want to go somewhere I've never been before.' I said, 'Try the kitchen.'
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I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
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So I went to the dentist. He said Say Aaah. I said Why? He said My dog's died.'
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How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.
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Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.
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I've got a very poor sense of direction. I keep forgetting which way is forwards.
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