Funny Facebook Status Quotes & Sayings

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Total: 567 Quotes
Face your problems don't Facebook your problems.
 Unknown quotes 
 Funny Facebook Status quotes   Clever Facebook Status quotes   Problems quotes   Clever Life quotes 
Suggest Revision: Face your problems don't Facebook your problems.
 
Who was the greatest prostitute in history? Ms. Pacman, for 25 cents that b*tch swallowed balls till she died.
 Will Ferrell quotes 
 Funny Facebook Status quotes   Prostitution quotes 
Suggest Revision: Who was the greatest prostitute in history? Ms. Pacman, for 25 cents that b*tch swallowed balls till she died.
 
Being popular on Facebook is like sitting at the cool table in the cafeteria at a mental hospital.
 Unknown quotes 
 Funny Facebook Status quotes   Clever Facebook Status quotes 
Suggest Revision: Being popular on Facebook is like sitting at the cool table in the cafeteria at a mental hospital.
 
I'm searching Facebook for people named Hontas, just because I think it would be cool... to poke a Hontas.
 Unknown quotes 
 Funny Facebook Status quotes   Just Because quotes 
Suggest Revision: I'm searching Facebook for people named Hontas, just because I think it would be cool... to poke a Hontas.
 
Cop pulls man over for suspicion of drunk driving. Cop: Sir have you been drinking? Man: No. Cop: Papers. Man: Scissors, I win!
 Unknown quotes 
 Funny Facebook Status quotes   Funny quotes   Driving quotes   Suspicion quotes 
Suggest Revision: Cop pulls man over for suspicion of drunk driving. Cop: Sir have you been drinking? Man: No. Cop: Papers. Man: Scissors, I win!
 
When my girlfriend and I fight, I tighten the top to every jar and bottle in the house. Just so I can say
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 Funny quotes   Relationship quotes   Funny Facebook Status quotes 
Suggest Revision: When my girlfriend and I fight, I tighten the top to every jar and bottle in the house. Just so I can say
 
Ladies: Please dress how you would like to be approached and talked to. Don't dress like a hoe and expect to be treated like a Queen.
 Unknown quotes 
 Funny Facebook Status quotes 
Suggest Revision: Ladies: Please dress how you would like to be approached and talked to. Don't dress like a hoe and expect to be treated like a Queen.
 
A guy sitting with his girlfriend, drinking beer says,
 Unknown quotes 
 Funny Facebook Status quotes 
Suggest Revision: A guy sitting with his girlfriend, drinking beer says,
 
My mother texted me 'What does IDK, LY & TTYL mean?' I answered: 'I dont know, love u, talk to u later.' Mother: 'Ok, I'll ask your sister'
 Unknown quotes 
 Funny Facebook Status quotes 
Suggest Revision: My mother texted me 'What does IDK, LY & TTYL mean?' I answered: 'I dont know, love u, talk to u later.' Mother: 'Ok, I'll ask your sister'
 
My wife always complains that I dont take her anywhere expensive... so I took her to the Gas Station.
 Unknown quotes 
 Funny Facebook Status quotes 
Suggest Revision: My wife always complains that I dont take her anywhere expensive... so I took her to the Gas Station.
 
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Thursday, May 23
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Face book is a very popular social networking website, interconnecting millions across the world. Face book, originally called Face smash, is a brainchild of Mark Zuckerberg. There are various applications, games and other interactive features that face book provides to all its members. Every member who has an account on face book has a homepage which is popularly called the "wall". On the wall, there is a space, where the face book user can speak his mind and use it to communicate or share his feelings with other face book users, whom he or she has listed as his friends. Funny face book status indicates any such status update which generates a lot of laughter and which people find really amazing. In the words of Sophia Bush, "I think the sexiest thing on anybody is intelligence. I respect somebody who has a brain and wants to use it more than a pretty face and status."
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