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Jeff Foxworthy Quotes & Sayings
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71 entries tagged including 12 subtopics.
Last updated Apr 2024
Jeff Foxworthy Topics
Funny
Jokes
Work
Friends
Dysfunctional Family
Redneck Girl
Neighbors
Humor
Jealousy
Wedding
School
QUOTES
My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.
Jeff Foxworthy
16 Likes
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My father-in-law gets up at 5 o'clock in the morning and watches the Discovery Channel. I don't know why there's this big rush to do this.
Jeff Foxworthy
6 Likes
Little girls love dolls. They just don't love doll clothes. We've got four thousand dolls and ain't one of them got a stitch of clothes on.
Jeff Foxworthy
11 Likes
It's hard to think of yourself as a loser at 2 years old.
Jeff Foxworthy
12 Likes
It's a weird sensation to be mad and learning at the same time.
Jeff Foxworthy
3 Likes
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If your working television sits on top of your non-working television, you might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
10 Likes
If your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home, you might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
8 Likes
Neighbors quotes
If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
5 Likes
If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
24 Likes
Redneck Girl quotes
If you have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say Kool Whip on the side, you might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
43 Likes
Redneck Girl quotes
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If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to a state fair. Because five minutes at the fair, you'll be going, 'you know, we're alright. We are dang near royalty.'
Jeff Foxworthy
40 Likes
Funny quotes
Dysfunctional Family quotes
If men have a smell it's usually an accident.
Jeff Foxworthy
3 Likes
I've been to all 50 states, and traveled this whole country, and 90 percent of the people are good folks. The rest of them take after the other side of the family.
Jeff Foxworthy
6 Likes
I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to deduct 100 IQ points.
Jeff Foxworthy
2 Likes
I turned down a movie this summer because it was nine weeks in Vancouver and my oldest daughter is 14. I've got four more summers with her. I'm not giving away nine weeks of her summer to go do a silly movie.
Jeff Foxworthy
25 Likes
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I tried real hard to play golf, and I was so bad at it they would have to check me for ticks at the end of the round because I'd spent about half the day in the woods.
Jeff Foxworthy
1 Likes
I refuse to this day to do e-mail because everybody I know that does it, it takes another two or three hours a day. I don't want to give two or three more hours away.
Jeff Foxworthy
0 Likes
I really don't require a whole lot in life.
Jeff Foxworthy
0 Likes
I know God is real. I know if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.
Jeff Foxworthy
3 Likes
I had to perform at the White House for the president, That's always kind of a weird set to try to put together.
Jeff Foxworthy
0 Likes
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