Unknown Quotes & Sayings

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I want to make a Facebook account and the name will be Nobody so when I see stupid crap people post, I can Like it. And it will say Nobody Likes This.
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Suggest Revision: I want to make a Facebook account and the name will be Nobody so when I see stupid crap people post, I can Like it. And it will say Nobody Likes This.
 
Facebook is like jail, you sit around and waste time, write on walls, and get poked by people you don't know.
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Suggest Revision: Facebook is like jail, you sit around and waste time, write on walls, and get poked by people you don't know.
 
The teacher asks Timmy
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Suggest Revision: The teacher asks Timmy
 
If you're talking behind my back, you're in a good position to kiss my ass!
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Suggest Revision: If you're talking behind my back, you're in a good position to kiss my ass!
 
Admit it, at least once in our life we have all tried to balance the light switch between the on and off position.
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Suggest Revision: Admit it, at least once in our life we have all tried to balance the light switch between the on and off position.
 
Im not going to stress over you anymore. It isnt worth it. I tried to work something out but you just ignored it. Im not trying to say I dont want you, because I definitely do. All Im saying is Im done chasing after you.
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Suggest Revision: Im not going to stress over you anymore. It isnt worth it. I tried to work something out but you just ignored it. Im not trying to say I dont want you, because I definitely do. All Im saying is Im done chasing after you.
 
Drunk people run stop signs, high people wait for them to turn green.
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Suggest Revision: Drunk people run stop signs, high people wait for them to turn green.
 
Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it's wide use three fingers, make sure it's wet and rub up and down. Yep that's how you wash a cup.
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Suggest Revision: Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it's wide use three fingers, make sure it's wet and rub up and down. Yep that's how you wash a cup.
 
Wife: honey I want you to whisper dirty things in my ear! Husband: kitchen, living room, dinning room, patio
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Suggest Revision: Wife: honey I want you to whisper dirty things in my ear! Husband: kitchen, living room, dinning room, patio
 
...condom says to the tampon,
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Suggest Revision: ...condom says to the tampon,
 
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