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Doctor Jokes Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Doctor Jokes" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
A woman tells her doctor, 'I've got a bad back.' The doctor says, 'It's old age.' The woman says, 'I want a second opinion.' The doctor says: 'Okay - you're ugly as well.'
Tommy Cooper
72 Likes
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When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my X-rays.
Henry Youngman
19 Likes
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The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman.
Jonathan Swift
1 Likes
Last christmas my sister, Geri, gave me a lovely Cloth calendar. It only took me 5 hours to sew in a Doctor's appointment...
Robert Paul
67 Likes
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I went to my doctor and asked for something for persistent wind. He gave me a kite. You see the trouble is he's very old fashioned. When he gives you an injection you have to bite on a bullet.
Les Dawson
59 Likes
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A woman tells her doctor, 'I've got a bad back.' The doctor says, 'It's old age.' The woman says, 'I want a second opinion.' The doctor says: 'Okay - you're ugly as well.'
Tommy Cooper
4 Likes
A woman tells her doctor, 'I've got a bad back.' The doctor says, 'It's old age.' The woman says, 'I want a second opinion.' The doctor says: 'Okay - you're ugly as well.'
Tommy Cooper
3 Likes
The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman
Jonathan Swift
14 Likes
Doctors quotes
I went to see my doctor with a nasty pain in the ass. Turns out he's already met my wife.
Nikhil Saluja
350 Likes
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The superior doctor prevents sickness; The mediocre doctor attends to impending sickness; The inferior doctor treats actual sickness.
Chinese Proverb
22 Likes
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Jokes are better than war. Even the most aggressive jokes are better than the least aggressive wars. Even the longest jokes are better than the shortest wars.
George Mikes
11 Likes
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It wasn't until I became more confident with myself and I put myself forward instead of the jokes; at first it was put the jokes out there and I'm just behind the jokes.
Wanda Sykes
0 Likes
Not really in all honesty because until you take control of your own health and go to your own doctor and have your own doctor tell you what's going to work for you.
Star Jones
1 Likes
I need a doctor, doctor to bring me back to life.
Skylar Grey
11 Likes
I was well aware of the fact that once you appeared in Doctor Who as something else, you were ruled out for the part of the Doctor: that was a kind of well known thing in the business.
Colin Baker
3 Likes
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There are some great questions to ask your doctor. If he says 'no,' then you find yourself a different doctor. There really has to be a change in how we medically look at women at this time. I mean, this is not just baby gloom.
Marie Osmond
2 Likes
At the eye doctor...Doctor: Please read the lowest line you can. Me: Made in China.
Unknown
217 Likes
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I believe I can do anything. If I decide I want to be a doctor tomorrow, I'm going to be a doctor.
Amy Jo Johnson
1 Likes
My mutherfu..ing doctor, said I need a doctor.
Lil Wayne
159 Likes
Doctor, doctor, please prescribe me something for the pain. Money in machines, those will make you change. If I go tomorrow, I just hope it ain't in vain but I can't complain.
Mac Miller
6 Likes
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