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Egg Funny Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Egg Funny" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period.
Unknown
1251 Likes
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Politics is a rotten egg; if broken, it stinks. Russian proverb.
Russian Proverb
29 Likes
Politics quotes
Id do anything for a perfect beach body, except work out and eat less.
Unknown
160 Likes
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This Christmas I've decided to put a mistletoe in my back pocket....so all the people I dont like can kiss my ass.
Unknown
719 Likes
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What people actually think: ha = you. suck. haha = not that funny. hahaha = really funny actually. hahahaha = funniest. thing. ever!! hahahahaha = I wanna be your friend/ gf/ bf. ahahahahaha = you. suck. a. lot.
Lala
106 Likes
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Dear Santa, ( ) I've been good all year. ( ) Ok most of the time. ( ) Once in a while. (X) fu.. it. I'll buy my own shit.
Unknown
917 Likes
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My resolution is to spend more time avoiding friends and family.
Unknown
25 Likes
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My resolution is to spend less time working which means you'll have to work more.
Unknown
8 Likes
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I hope one of your New Year's resolutions is to stop tagging me in New Year's photos.
Unknown
39 Likes
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For my new year's resolution, I promise to stop correcting your terrible spelling and focus more on your horrific grammar.
Unknown
20 Likes
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Sorry that, statistically speaking, you probably won't fulfill your resolution.
Unknown
8 Likes
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My resolution is to get healthier while still destroying myself with alcohol and drugs.
Unknown
21 Likes
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Funny is funny is funny.
Bob Newhart
0 Likes
I love funny people, and when I'm with funny people, or people who are amusing in their weirdness, I love it. Because that to me is funny, as opposed to someone who stops and says, 'Hey let me tell you a joke.'
Paul Feig
6 Likes
My excuses for already failing my New Year's resolution are more complicated than the fiscal cliff deal.
Unknown
22 Likes
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Mom: Your great aunt just passed away. LOL Me: Why is that funny? Mom: It's not funny David! What do you mean? Me: Mom lol means laughing out loud! Mom: Oh my goodness! I sent that to everyone I thought it meant lots of love. I have to call everyone back oh God.
Unknown
800 Likes
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His parents were shiftless and unsuccessful farm people - his imagination had never really accepted them as his parents at all. The truth was that Jay Gatsby of West Egg, Long Island, sprang from his Platonic conception of himself. He was a son of God...and he must be about His Father's business, the service of a vast, vulgar, and meretricious beauty. So he invented...Jay Gatsby...and to this conception he was faithful to the end.
F Scott Fitzgerald
19 Likes
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If this is some kind of practical joke, it's not funny, and I know funny. I'm a clownfish. -Marlin
Finding Nemo
5 Likes
There should be a rule against people trying to be funny before the sun comes up.
Kristen Chandler
262 Likes
Funny Good Morning quotes
The awkward moment when you realize your joke isn't as funny as you thought.
Unknown
224 Likes
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