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Funny Clever Status Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Clever Status" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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OH NICE, so you can update your status via mobile, but you cant text me back?
Unknown
876 Likes
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Saying I don't take my meds because they make me feel funny. Is like cannibals saying they don't eat clowns because the taste funny.
Stanley Victor Paskavich
405 Likes
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Going to McDonald's for a salad is like going to a prostitute for a hug.
Unknown
1203 Likes
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When I was a kid, I used to sing, 'A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, ELEMENO, P'
Unknown
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Knowledge is realizing that the street is one-way, wisdom is looking both directions anyway.
Unknown
536 Likes
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There are two types of human beings found on Facebook. One who gets enormous amount of likes and comments on their posts. And the others are men.
Unknown
1102 Likes
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The best time to look for a job is when you already have one. Men apply the same theory to looking for a girlfriend.
Unknown
931 Likes
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Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
Unknown
222 Likes
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I wonder if the clothes in China say, 'Made around the corner.'
Unknown
919 Likes
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Face your problems don't Facebook your problems.
Unknown
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War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left.
Unknown
854 Likes
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Spent the entire night trying to create a website for women drivers, but it kept crashing.
Unknown
696 Likes
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It's a recipe for disaster when your country has an obesity epidemic and a skinny jean fad.
Unknown
842 Likes
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My 'check engine' light came on while driving to work this morning. I looked and the engine is still there.
Unknown
546 Likes
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Admit it, at least once in our life we have all tried to balance the light switch between the on and off position.
Unknown
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'Are you as bored as I am?' Makes sense even when you read it backwards...
Unknown
1246 Likes
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I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching...my car into reverse and driving away from the accident.
Unknown
563 Likes
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Behind every great woman, there is a guy looking at her ass.
Unknown
573 Likes
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Say this out loud five times fast! 'I won a math debate.'
Unknown
616 Likes
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I read something the other day that made me piss myself. It was a sign that said: 'Bathroom closed.'
Unknown
572 Likes
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