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Funny Driving Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Driving" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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I really think we should pass a law in every state, I don't care whether it takes the independence away from an old person or not. You shouldn't be driving a car if you're over the age of 80. Maybe even less than that.
Evel Knievel
23 Likes
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Why do single women take advice from other single women? That's like Stevie Wonder giving Ray Charles driving directions.
Hussein Nishah
350 Likes
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You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.'
Tommy Cooper
8 Likes
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That mini heart attack you get when the parked car next to you moves and you think you're moving.
Unknown
111 Likes
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Just dropped my last baby at a play date now I'm driving 1 hr to take my dog to school. Not funny something wrong with this picture.
Brooke Burke
17 Likes
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My 'check engine' light came on while driving to work this morning. I looked and the engine is still there.
Unknown
546 Likes
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Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.
George Burns
48 Likes
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My stupid GPS can't find Rack City. bi....
Unknown
465 Likes
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You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice.
Tommy Cooper
44 Likes
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I wish Google maps had an, 'Avoid The Ghetto Route' option.
Unknown
230 Likes
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I think car horns should sound like gun shots....I bet you'll move then.
Unknown
168 Likes
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I don't care whether you're driving a hybrid or an SUV. If you're headed for a cliff, you have to change direction. That's what the American people called for in November, and that's what we intend to deliver.
Barack Obama
10 Likes
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No officer, I didn't see you in my rear view...my eyes haven't left my phone for at least the past 5 miles...
Unknown
100 Likes
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I'm all about sharing the road with other drivers...as long as they use the part that's behind me.
Unknown
38 Likes
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Women drivers are like stars in the sky. You can see them, but they can't see you.
Unknown
77 Likes
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Women only have trouble parking because we are constantly lied to about what 8 inches is.
Unknown
112 Likes
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Never text while driving. I'm pretty sure what you have to tell someone is not more important than your life.
Unknown
100 Likes
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It's funny how a hello is always accompanied with a goodbye. It's funny how good memories can make you cry, it's funny how forever never seems to last, it's funny how much you would lose if you forgot about your past, it's funny how friends can just leave when you're down, it's funny how when you need someone they never are around, it's funny how people change and think they're so much better, it's funny how some many lies are packed into one love letter, it's funny how one night can hold so much regret, it's funny how you can forgive but not forget, it's funny how ironic life turns out to be, but the funniest part of all, is that none of that is funny to me.
Unknown
565 Likes
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Baseball is like driving, it's the one who gets home safely that counts.
Tommy Lasorda
23 Likes
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My driving abilities from Mexico have helped me get through Hollywood.
Salma Hayek
19 Likes
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