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Funny Drunk Drivers Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Drunk Drivers" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Drunk drivers are somewhat better them people texting while driving cause at least the drunk drivers are trying to look at the road.
Unknown
15 Likes
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Is that your final answer? Here in New York garbage men, bus drivers, taxi cab drivers, bus drivers, whoever, you know, people just yell it out to me. So that was a lot of fun.
Regis Philbin
2 Likes
After the crash happened, I was so humiliated and embarrassed. I thought of Mothers Against Drunk Drivers, that they must hate me.
Tracey Gold
1 Likes
A female officer pulls over a drunk man. The officer tells him, Anything you say will be held against you! Then the drunk man yells, TITTIES!
Unknown
988 Likes
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No officer, I swear to drunk I'm not God!
Unknown
86 Likes
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Youre not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
Unknown
31 Likes
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Listen, I'm not an alcoholic, alcoholics go to meetings. I'm a drunk, we go to parties.
Unknown
159 Likes
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Before someone gets their drivers liscence they should have to beat Rainbow Road on Mario Kart without falling off.
Unknown
376 Likes
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I dont make enough money to go on vacation, so I'm just going to get drunk this weekend until I dont know where I am.
Unknown
382 Likes
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My girlfriend told me to go out and get something that makes her look s..y...so I came back drunk.
Unknown
385 Likes
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Drunk Logic: 'She's only ugly in the face.'
Unknown
89 Likes
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I consider myself one of a very small handful of drivers in the world that are top drivers. The best one? I don't think anybody can say they're the best one because, from one week to the next, you can be on form or off form a little bit.
Nigel Mansell
15 Likes
I have talked to stunt drivers all my life, 32 years of talking to stunt drivers. There's a craziness to them.
Bryan Cranston
4 Likes
I would watch NASCAR if the drivers had had as much to drink as the fans.
Unknown
242 Likes
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The drivers have one foot on the brake, one on the clutch, and one on the throttle.
Bob Varsha
6 Likes
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If you can't take control, let Jesus take the wheel and hope he's not drunk.
Unknown
38 Likes
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I love how since my dad got laid off all he does is get drunk, sleep, get drunk, & bi... at me for always being out lol.
Unknown
11 Likes
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My dad was very successful running midgets in Texas. Then, his two drivers ran into some bad luck. People started saying that Daddy had lost his touch. That it was the cars and not the drivers. I wanted to race just to prove all those people wrong.
A J Foyt
3 Likes
When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk, and go to heaven!
Unknown
51 Likes
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Being drunk n happy is good...Being drunk and sad isn't good...But I'm just drunk...Here nor there.
Unknown
22 Likes
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