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Funny I Dont Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny I Dont" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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I dont like crude oil, because its so vulgar.
Jarod Kintz
9 Likes
Funny quotes
Oil quotes
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Dont let the spike hair fool you, like Im not a b*tch.
Pauly D
64 Likes
Funny quotes
Hair quotes
Dont believe your friends when they ask you to be honest with them. All they really want is to be maintained in the good opinion they have of themselves.
Albert Camus
18 Likes
Funny quotes
Best Friends quotes
Dont complain about the snow on your neighbors roof when your own doorstep is unclean.
Confucius
29 Likes
Funny quotes
Snow quotes
Dont drink and drive, you might hit a bump and spill your drink.
Unknown
28 Likes
Funny quotes
Drunk quotes
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People dont turn forty. They turn 39.95 plus shipping and handling.
Unknown
80 Likes
Funny quotes
40th Birthday quotes
I like funny people. I dislike boring people. I dont wanna just sit there & hear you breathing.
Unknown
16 Likes
Life and love is kinda funny some time cause the guys we want are so hard to get, but the ones that we dont want... are so hard to get rid of...
Unknown
119 Likes
I Like You quotes
Men who dont understand women fall into two groups: Bachelors and Husbands.
Unknown
20 Likes
Funny quotes
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Nobody cares that youre smart and nobody cares that your kids dont have bruises.
Jim Jefferies
16 Likes
Funny quotes
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Dont be a racist. Be like Mario. He's an Italian plumber; created by Japanese people, who speak English and look like Mexicans.
Unknown
253 Likes
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I dont hate you. I just hope your next period happens in a shark tank.
Unknown
569 Likes
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Im not stupid, I just lack common sense. Im not a poser, I just like all kinds of clothes. Im not Miss Popularity, I just have a lot of friends. I dont ignore you, I just dont give a shit. Im not a bi..., Im just honest. Im not insecure, I just dont trust people.
Unknown
185 Likes
Depressing quotes
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My girlfriend bought be a collared shirt for my birthday, mainly so I dont get too far ahead of her when she takes me for a walk.
Jarod Kintz
382 Likes
Funny quotes
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Having s.. with an ugly person is like bungee jumping, you know your gonna enjoy it but for f*cks sake just dont look down.
Unknown
25 Likes
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People tell me there is plenty of fish in the sea, well that is nice and all but Im human, I dont date fish.
Unknown
173 Likes
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3 rules in a relationship: Dont lie, dont cheat and dont make promises you cant keep.
Ritu Ghatourey
97 Likes
Relationship Advice quotes
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Folks, the President needs a break. Hes like a Black and Decker cordless Dirt Devil vacuum. If you dont recharge his batteries, he cant suck.
Steven Colbert
2 Likes
Funny quotes
People quotes
Dont mistake my silence for ignorance,dont mistake my calmness for acceptance,and dont mistake my kindness for weakness.
Unknown
82 Likes
My mother texted me 'What does IDK, LY & TTYL mean?' I answered: 'I dont know, love u, talk to u later.' Mother: 'Ok, I'll ask your sister'
Unknown
1187 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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