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Funny One Night Stan Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny One Night Stan" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
Stan: Uh, excuse me, are you Francine's boss? Man: Yes. Stan: (Into wrist communicator) Go! Go! Go! You're all under arrest. Man: For what? Stan: Possession of cocaine donuts. Man: Those are powdered sugar. Stan: Put it in a rap song, jailbird. This office is permanently closed. Man: What are you saying? Stan: I'm saying you're fired. Donald Trump: (Clearing throat) Stan: Oh, for God's sake. Somebody pay Mr. Trump.
American Dad
9 Likes
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Stan: (Picks up telephone) This is Stan Smith. Principal Lewis: Mr. Smith, I'm afraid there's a problem with your son. Stan: Oh, God, he's gay. This is it. This is the gay call. I've been ready for this for years. (Starts chugging down pills) Principal Lewis: Uhh, no. It's just that he's gone mad with power. He evacuated the entire school and barricaded himself in my office. Stan: I see. (Foam starts coming out of his mouth) Henry, antidote!
American Dad
6 Likes
Who are taking to the witch burning Saturday night?
Stan Freberg
1 Likes
It's funny how a hello is always accompanied with a goodbye. It's funny how good memories can make you cry, it's funny how forever never seems to last, it's funny how much you would lose if you forgot about your past, it's funny how friends can just leave when you're down, it's funny how when you need someone they never are around, it's funny how people change and think they're so much better, it's funny how some many lies are packed into one love letter, it's funny how one night can hold so much regret, it's funny how you can forgive but not forget, it's funny how ironic life turns out to be, but the funniest part of all, is that none of that is funny to me.
Unknown
565 Likes
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Dance with me all night long and make my heart feel like I'm a one in a million.
Alexandra Stan
6 Likes
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Stan: Francine, I want you to stop this nonsense. Francine: "Nonsense"? This job is my career. Stan: No, my job is a career. This is just some silly housewife's hobby. Francine: Oh, yeah? Well, this silly housewife loves her "hobby." She's good at it. In fact, she kicks ass! So, her big career-man husband is just going to have to deal with it. Stan: I could have assassinated you! Francine: What? Stan: Nothing.
American Dad
14 Likes
Stan: Here's your allowance, champ! Steve: Wow... a whole five bucks. Stan: Yeah, I'm gonna need change.
American Dad
3 Likes
Hayley: (To Stan) You know, Steve's dog would still be alive if you right-wing lunatics would agree to gun control. Stan: You know what I have to say to that? (Pause) Ah, I thought I was gonna fart.
American Dad
12 Likes
Stan: Francine, what the hell is going on? You were fired. (Donald Trump comes in) Stan: That's passive past tense, Trump! You don't own that!
American Dad
1 Likes
Stan: (After seeing Scab Bum) Who the hell is that? Steve: He doesn't have a name. Stan: What? Steve: He killed his own name.
American Dad
1 Likes
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Stan: What makes you think you're gonna survive? Roger: My species is immune to all human ailments. Stan: So explain that cold sore. Roger: Mind your own business!
American Dad
5 Likes
Stan: Hilary, look out for the mines! (Explosion) What did I just say? You heard me. What did I just say? Steve: You said, "Look out for the mines." Stan: I said, "Look out for the mines."
American Dad
18 Likes
Stan: (With gun, searching the house) Osama, is that you? (Hears noise, fires gun) Roger: Geez, Stan, what gives? Holy Toledo, you killed your son's dog! And don't ask me to bring him back with that E.T. finger thing because that's a giant load of crap.
American Dad
2 Likes
Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'
Charlie Brown
25 Likes
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Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'
Charlie Brown
25 Likes
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The trouble is not that players have s.. the night before a game. It's that they stay out all night looking for it.
Casey Stengal
16 Likes
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Sometimes I lie awake at night, and ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'
Charles M Schulz
11 Likes
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I felt so bad last night for having this one night stand, the following day I got another one for the other side of the bed.
Unknown
298 Likes
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Sometimes I lie awake at night, and ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'
Charles M Schulz
16 Likes
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Sometimes I lie awake at night, and ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'
Charles M Schulz
13 Likes
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