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Funny Status On Men Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Status On Men" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
There are two types of human beings found on Facebook. One who gets enormous amount of likes and comments on their posts. And the others are men.
Unknown
1102 Likes
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The best time to look for a job is when you already have one. Men apply the same theory to looking for a girlfriend.
Unknown
931 Likes
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Welcome to the real Internet, where the men are men, the women are men, and the children are the FBI.
Unknown
347 Likes
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Boobs: Proof that men can pay attention to two things at once.
Unknown
413 Likes
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Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
Unknown
348 Likes
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My doctor told me not to lift anything heavy for a few weeks. So now I have to sit down when I pee.
Unknown
664 Likes
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If a bra is called an 'Over the shoulder bolder holder,' then would you call men's underwear 'Under the butt nut hut?'
Unknown
486 Likes
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Men were born between a woman's legs and spend the rest of their lives trying to get back in them. There's no place like home.
Unknown
666 Likes
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OH NICE, so you can update your status via mobile, but you cant text me back?
Unknown
876 Likes
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Saying I don't take my meds because they make me feel funny. Is like cannibals saying they don't eat clowns because the taste funny.
Stanley Victor Paskavich
405 Likes
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How much cocaine does Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men...
Unknown
475 Likes
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Going to McDonald's for a salad is like going to a prostitute for a hug.
Unknown
1203 Likes
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When I was a kid, I used to sing, 'A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, ELEMENO, P'
Unknown
2231 Likes
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Whoever said white men can't jump has clearly never played Temple Run.
Unknown
220 Likes
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Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
Unknown
222 Likes
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For these men, s.. is about power and identity and self worth and status. Women exist to reward men with pu...; we have no right to deny worthy men our bodies. We're barely human, and need men to awaken our s..uality.
Unknown
7 Likes
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I wonder if the clothes in China say, 'Made around the corner.'
Unknown
919 Likes
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Dear Monday, even my girlfriend's period is a better surprise than you.
Unknown
89 Likes
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Before s.... you help each other get naked, after s.. you only dress yourself. Moral of the story: in life no one helps you once you're fu..ed.
Unknown
2197 Likes
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My girlfriend caught me blow drying my pe..s...She asked what was I doing. Apparently, 'heating up your dinner' wasn't a s..y answer.
Unknown
570 Likes
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