Funny The Facebook Timeline Quotes

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Suggest Revision: Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and answer to, all of life's problems.
 
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Suggest Revision: Facebook's timeline is my favorite way to watch girls from high school get fat.
 
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Suggest Revision: Social networking is like a club. Twitter is the dance floor, tumblr is the bar and facebook is the people crying in the toilets.
 
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Suggest Revision: It's funny the way most people love the dead. Once you're dead, you're made for life.
 
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Suggest Revision: 3 Jobs that changed the world: Hand, Blow and Steve.
 
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Suggest Revision: Anyone who says having a child is the best moment of their life has obviously never had two Kit-Kats fall out of a vending machine at once.
 
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Suggest Revision: Sexually rubbing the wall until you find the light switch.
 
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Suggest Revision: Spent the entire night trying to create a website for women drivers, but it kept crashing.
 
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Suggest Revision: If the professor doesn't show up to class in the first 15 minutes, you get to leave. Somebody make that a law, please.
 
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Suggest Revision: The older the Facebook post, the creepier your 'Like' becomes.
 
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