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Most Recent Funny Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Most Recent Funny" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
Congrats to LeBron James on his recent engagement and to his fiance who now leads the family with 1 ring!
Unknown
73 Likes
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A recent conversation: Dubya: Look at the clock, time is racing! Cheney: That's the second hand, George!
Dennis Miller
17 Likes
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I was almost hoping that the pregnancy test I took would show up positive so there would be an explanation for my recent weight gain.
Unknown
31 Likes
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The hardest part of your divorce will be finding an attractive recent picture of yourself to upload on a dating site.
Unknown
5 Likes
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The UN Commission on Human Rights, whose membership in recent years has included countries - such as Libya and Sudan - which have deplorable human rights records, and the recent Oil-for-Food scandal, are just a few examples of why reform is so imperative.
John Linder
10 Likes
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I'm sorry my recent absence from work caused you to have to do your own work.
Unknown
43 Likes
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It's funny how a hello is always accompanied with a goodbye. It's funny how good memories can make you cry, it's funny how forever never seems to last, it's funny how much you would lose if you forgot about your past, it's funny how friends can just leave when you're down, it's funny how when you need someone they never are around, it's funny how people change and think they're so much better, it's funny how some many lies are packed into one love letter, it's funny how one night can hold so much regret, it's funny how you can forgive but not forget, it's funny how ironic life turns out to be, but the funniest part of all, is that none of that is funny to me.
Unknown
565 Likes
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I don't accept at all the quite popular argument that the press is responsible for the monarchy's recent troubles. The monarchy's responsible for the monarchy's recent troubles. To blame the press is the old thing of blaming the messenger for the message.
Anthony Holden
0 Likes
A recent survey stated that the average person's greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you're telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy.
Jerry Seinfield
535 Likes
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If it tastes funny, don't eat it. If it looks funny, call a doctor. If it is funny, it must have been something I said.
Unknown
189 Likes
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I'm not so funny. Gilda was funny. I'm funny on camera sometimes. In life, once in a while. Once in a while. But she was funny. She spent more time worrying about being liked than anything else.
Gene Wilder
2 Likes
The man whose authority is recent is always stern.
Aeschylus
0 Likes
There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.
George Carlin
2 Likes
The equation of religion with belief is rather recent.
Arnold J Toynbee
0 Likes
One more recent novelist to come along is Cormac McCarthy. Him, I like.
Leslie Fiedler
0 Likes
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Your recent breakup has really put me in the holiday spirit.
Unknown
0 Likes
My most recent purchase was a black lace corset.
Lexa Doig
1 Likes
Actually, it is a fact that I've been doing more writing than playing in recent years.
Gerry Mulligan
1 Likes
With a recent birthday, I've been acting now for twenty years.
Thayer David
0 Likes
I mean in recent years, I think you've only got to sell thirty or forty thousand to get a 1.
Neil Innes
1 Likes
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