My New Girlfriend Quotes

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Total: 50581 Quotes
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Suggest Revision: I had the best day ever, I ran into my ex girlfriend and her new boyfriend.......With my car.
 
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Suggest Revision: This year my New Year's resolution was to stop saying 'Seacrest out!' after I ejaculate.
 
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Suggest Revision: I have no way of knowing how people really feel, but the vast majority of those I meet couldn't be nicer. Every once in a while someone barks at me. My New Year's resolution is not to bark back.
 
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Suggest Revision: My ex-girlfriend had a really weird fetish. She used to like to dress up as herself and then act like a f*ckin' bitch all the time.
 
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Suggest Revision: My new life goal: finish every project I start.
 
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Suggest Revision: I just want to start over. I want new friends. If any of my old friends make it in my new life, we were meant to be friends.
 
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Suggest Revision: I hope the world ends in 2012 so I can't be held accountable for my New Year's resolutions.
 
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Suggest Revision: To be fair to my ex girlfriend, I hope she'll always be memorable and unique to me. God forbid I ever find another woman that fat and hairy.
 
No, I'm not jealous of your new girlfriend. I feel sorry for her, because she's dating an unfaithful selfish asshole.
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Suggest Revision: No, I'm not jealous of your new girlfriend. I feel sorry for her, because she's dating an unfaithful selfish asshole.
 
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 Unknown quotes  | added by: ryanswainofficial
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Suggest Revision: I'm not saying my ex-girlfriend is a slut I am just saying if everyone's cock had wings she'd be a airport.
 
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