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Uncle Status After He Died Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Uncle Status After He Died" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Grammar is important! Capitalization is the difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse and helping your Uncle jack off a horse.
Unknown
1973 Likes
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Sorry, I can't hangout. My uncle's cousin's sister in law's best friend's insurance agent's roommate's pet goldfish died. Maybe next time..
Unknown
268 Likes
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My diabetic neighbor died in his sleep. I forgot to wish him 'sweet dreams.'
Unknown
282 Likes
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IT is mere coincidence that Cooper was born in the year which produced The Power of Sympathy and that when he died Uncle Tom's Cabin was passing through its serial stage, and yet the limits of his life mark almost exactly the first great period of American fiction.
Carl Clinton Van Doren
2 Likes
Uncle Rico: Back in '82, I used to be able to throw a pigskin a quarter mile. Kip: Are you serious? Uncle Rico: I'm dead serious.
Napoleon Dynamite
2 Likes
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Uncle Rico: Back in '82, I used to be able to throw a pigskin a quarter mile. Kip: Are you serious? Uncle Rico: I'm dead serious.
Napoleon Dynamite
0 Likes
You can tell your uncle stuff that you could not tell your dad. That is kind of the role of an uncle. I feel very much like a father sometimes but sometimes I feel like a teammate.
Dusty Baker
27 Likes
My uncle was a hero, Lewis Roundtree. He was not even related to me really, but he was always called my uncle. He was like a father to me. I was closer to him than I was my father.
Ed Bradley
6 Likes
When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all go play in his cave, and every once in a while he would eat one of us. It wasn't until later that I found out that Uncle Caveman was a bear.
Jack Handey
63 Likes
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I've died so many times. I'm 65. On my 40th birthday, my girlfriend gave me a reel with ways I had died, whether it was by knife, or electrocution or drowning or being thrown off a building or whatever it might have been. I've died a lot of times!
Jonathan Banks
14 Likes
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Never in my life have I seen a tombstone that read: Died for not forwarding that text to 10 people.
Unknown
475 Likes
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The king died and then the queen died is a story. The king died, and then queen died of grief is a plot.
E M Forster
4 Likes
The honest reason was my niece and nephew weren't allowed to see Uncle Vin movies, and they're my biggest fans. I guess I got a little sick of, 'No, you can't come to this one no, you can't come to that one.' And they're, 'But I saw the poster, Uncle Vin.'
Vin Diesel
41 Likes
Who was the greatest prostitute in history? Ms. Pacman, for 25 cents that b*tch swallowed balls till she died.
Will Ferrell
1343 Likes
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Call Of Duty will really have a guy thinking about joining the army...then you realize how many times you died.
Unknown
326 Likes
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If you don't have a Facebook account, all your high school friends just assume you died.
Unknown
169 Likes
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OH NICE, so you can update your status via mobile, but you cant text me back?
Unknown
876 Likes
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In movies when ever people go under the sea I hold my breath, I almost died in Finding Nemo.
Hussein Nishah
483 Likes
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Right now, I'm worth a million dollars, and I owe Uncle Sam a million-and-a-half dollars, and I made a deal with him. I said, 'Uncle Sam, I'm going to pay you 25 grand a month.'
Robert Blake
2 Likes
Leonardo DiCaprio never died in the Titanic...Last scene; him going underwater. 1st Scene in Inception; he wakes up on a beach.
Unknown
43 Likes
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