Did You Ever Notice That Life Seems To Follow Certain Patterns? Like I Noticed That Every Year Around This Time, I Hear Christmas Music.

Dear Santa, what I want for Christmas is... your list with names of naughty girls.

Unknown

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What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.

Phyllis Diller

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Dear Santa, ( ) I've been good all year. ( ) Ok most of the time. ( ) Once in a while. (X) fu.. it. I'll buy my own sh...

Unknown

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Mail your packages early so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas.

Johnny Carson

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Santa Claus wears a Red Suit, He must be a communist. And a beard and long hair, Must be a pacifist. What's in that pipe that he's smoking?"

Arlo Guthrie

21 Likes

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The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.

Jay Leno

35 Likes

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