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Ive got to a stage in life where I have learned who my real friends are. You dont need many, you just need good, solid friends. My brother, Casey, is another one and my godfather is a really brilliant guy.
I flew back just in time to pick up a toilet seat for my girlfriend. It didn't go over that well. I thought, 'It's a famous thing. It should be treated well.'
Well I've never used that phrase before, but yes she is bootylicious.
If I ever woke up with a dead hooker in my hotel room, Matt would be the first person I'd call.
Sometimes it's Britney Spears and sometimes it's Carrie Fisher. I can't tell if I've got a Lolita complex or an Oedipus complex.
At a certain point, some things in your life shouldn't be used to sell movies. Hey, I have two sphincters! See my Movie!
Rumors about me? Calista Flockhart, Pam Anderson, and Matt Damon. That's who I'm dating.
Yes, I'm going to be the President of the United States. You know why? You think you can get chicks by being in the movies? You can really get chicks by being the President.
Never film yourself having sex. You think you'll look powerful and vital, but you don't. You look like a sick, shivering polar bear.
There is nothing worse that a thirteen-year-old boy. You're embarrassed by your parents, and you're trying to find your independance because, deep inside, you are so dependent on your mom.
On the night of the awards, I carried the Oscar around waist-high. I never had so many women ask me 'Can I touch it?' in my life. Sadly, they were talking about the statuette.
I'm always described as 'cocksure' or 'with a swagger,' and that bears no resemblance to who I feel like inside. I feel plagued by insecurity.
You know George M. Steinbrenner III is the center of all evil in the universe.
Being Hurt By Someone You Love
Brother And Sister
I Love You
Leaving To College
Mothers Day Card
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