TOPIC
AUTHOR
Close
Search
Close
Search
Close
Search
Close
Search
EVENTS
MEMBERS
LOGIN
SIGN UP
Quotes
Topics
Pictures
Questions
Authors
Blog
About
Terms
Privacy
Sitemap
Get in Touch
Advertise
Removal Request
Subscribe
Contact Us
Social
Facebook
Instagram
Twitter
Pinterest
Close
Submit Quote
Latest Quotes
Browse our latest quotes
Topic List
Categorized list of quote topics
Famous Authors
Alphabetical list of influential authors
Picture Quotes
Custom and user added quotes with pictures
Quotes
Questions
Submit Quote
My boss told me to get my butt in gear. I told him I was shiftless.
Jay London
1 Likes
1 Comments
RELATED QUOTES
I'm on performance enhancing drugs, so I may cause drowsiness.
Jay London
1 Likes
Sponsored Links
I'm convinced my cockroaches have military training, I set off a roach bomb - they diffused it.
Jay London
2 Likes
I went to the store and bought lady fingers, when I got home I noticed one of the fingers was missing so I went back to the store and the manager was nice enough to give me the finger.
Jay London
0 Likes
I went to the doctor and he said I had acute appendicitis, and I said compared to who?
Jay London
2 Likes
I went to a urologist - he told me I could go at any time.
Jay London
1 Likes
Sponsored Links
I went to a record store and asked for 50 cent. They kicked me out for pan-handling.
Jay London
6 Likes
I went out with a promiscuous impressionist - she did everybody.
Jay London
0 Likes
I was lonely driving here tonight so I hugged the road.
Jay London
0 Likes
I was going to buy a book on hair loss, but the pages kept falling out.
Jay London
4 Likes
I was born nine months premature.
Jay London
1 Likes
Sponsored Links
I wanted to take up music, so my father bought me a blunt instrument. He told me to knock myself out.
Jay London
0 Likes
I wanted to join the Army the sign said 'Be All That You Can Be', they told me it wasn't enough.
Jay London
1 Likes
TRENDING
TRENDING TOPICS
Apr 25
Beautiful
Being A Father
Bizarre
Break Up
Circumstances
Darkness
Faith
Feeling
Gay
Kissing
Life
Lost Friendship
Love
Morning
Never Give Up
Night
Poetry
Self-improvement
Sweet Love
Television
ABOUT
Terms
Privacy Policy
Removal Request
Sitemap
Contact Us
OUR GOAL
Our goal is to help you by delivering amazing quotes to bring inspiration, personal growth, love and happiness to your everyday life.
© 2024 SearchQuotes™