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Nothing very very good and nothing very very bad ever lasts for very very long.
New York is a theme park for people with IQs over 108.
Never loan a book to someone if you expect to get it back. Loaning books is the same as giving them away.
Nature is one great big wood-chipper. Sooner or later, everything shoots out the other end in a spray of blood, bones and hair.
Most people have no idea how to politely answer a phone. The English do, and it's been their only major business advantage for the past two centuries.
Most of us have only two or three genuinely interesting moments in our lives; the rest is filler.
Men won't read any email from a woman that's over 200 words long.
Making eye contact with adults while dressed as a clown is risky.
Make your goals big and broad enough so that they never become answered prayers and boomerang to curse you.
Lottery tickets are a surtax on desperation.
Long lives aren't natural. We forget that senior citizens are as much an invention as toasters or penicillin.
Life always kills you in the end, but first it prevents you from getting what you want.
It's weird when people start sentences with 'frankly' - as if their other sentences don't count.
Being Hurt By Someone You Love
Dont Judge Me
Funny Facebook Status
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