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So the American government lied to the Native Americans for many, many years, and then President Clinton lied about a relationship, and everyone was surprised! A little naive, I feel!
Never put a sock in a toaster.
MAC gave me 55 lipsticks to test. These are the same lipsticks I got caught stealing by the police when I was 15. How ironic.
If you've never seen an elephant ski, you've never been on acid.
I like my coffee like I like my women. In a plastic cup.
I grew up in Europe, where the history comes from.
Boy bands should be exploded from a great height. They're just pretty people singing music written by others.
I think on the seventh day, God was running around, going, Oh, my God! What havent I¦? Rwanda! I better create Rwanda! Sorry, havent quite done that¦ The Tower of Pisa! Oh, its leaning¦ Oh, shi¦ done! Toilets in French camping sites¦ there we go. English football hooligans¦ there we go, whatever that is¦ Mrs. Thatchers heart¦ there we go¦ oh, fuck that! I know, Ill put a stone in, thatll work! There we go¦ The next week, I think, people are coming back, going, Rwanda doesnt work very well; infrastructures fucked.
So my choice is 'Or Death?
Puberty is the sickest joke God plays on us. So you're just noticing members of the sex: Girls girls, ooo. Naturally you want to look your best, and God says No! You will look the worst you've ever looked in your life!
So in Europe, we had empires. Everyone had them - France and Spain and Britain and Turkey! The Ottoman Empire, full of furniture for some reason. And the Austro-Hungarian Empire, famous for fuck all! Yes, all they did was slowly collapse like a flan in a cupboard.
We have archeology on television, and I quite like it; its a sort of detective thing, but its really true, you know its there¦ But its kind of slow on telly, it has this problem of, Weve been here three weeks on live television, and weve taken off about a millimeter of top soil so far¦ Theres men with brushes and beards¦ maybe theyve just got beards, Im not sure¦ We found this and carbon-dated it to last Tuesday, so were very excited¦
So the American government lied to the Native Americans for many, many years, and then President Clinton lied about a relationship, and everyone was surprised! A little naÃ¯ve, I feel!
Being A Mom
Good Triumphs Over Evil
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