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There's only so much you can do until you get on set and see the aesthetics of what you're dealing with. Then you see what the other players are giving to you. It's all about the transfer of energy between different actors.
That's always an interesting concept when you try to make your dream into a reality and you come up against the facts of exactly what it is you're attempting to do.
That is a big danger, losing your inspiration. When I work in film and television I try to do each take a little differently. I never want to do the same thing twice, because then you're not being spontaneous, you're just recreating something.
Now I'm this far up the ladder and I've got so much farther to go with what I want to achieve with it.
It's such a small industry here you inevitably end up working with the same people over and over again. There are only so many actors to go around, which is good for us.
It was always something I knew I was capable of and from an early age my mother was involved in the film industry. She used to work at a production company. So I was exposed to a renaissance period of films in New Zealand back in the early 80's.
I'll need every ounce that I have to drive it through. Film and TV require that energy. Sometimes fight scenes can be pretty intense. When I was shooting Heaven it was truly guerrilla film-making.
I don't see a benefit in accepting every single little morsel of work that comes along because I think in essence what you're doing is you're raping yourself really.
I did a little theatre work after that and the following year I got another part in a television series. Then it was almost to the end of the year before I got more work. That was coming to terms with the reality of the vocation I had chosen.
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