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This year my New Year's resolution was to stop saying 'Seacrest out!' after I ej...late.
Zach Galifianakis
42 Likes
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42 Comments
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A New Year's resolution is something that goes in one Year and out the other.
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New Years Resolution: To tolerate fools more gladly, provided this does not encourage them to take up more of my time.
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Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now averagewhich means, you have met your New Year's resolution.
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Resolution One: I will live for God. Resolution Two: If no one else does, I still will.
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I will stop peeping into my boyfriend's female friends profile on facebook.
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Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.
Mark Twain
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New Year's Resolution: To tolerate fools more gladly, provided this does not encourage them to take up more of my time.
James Agate
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Never tell your resolution beforehand, or it's twice as onerous a duty.
John Selden
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It may almost be a question whether such wisdom as many of us have in our mature years has not come from the dying out of the power of temptation, rather than as the results of thought and resolution.
Anthony Trollope
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I know. I'm lazy. But I made myself a New Years resolution that I would write myself something really special. Which means I have 'til December, right?
Catherine O'Hara
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They have had three years to get a resolution and they failed. Both of these guys have failed.
Marcel Dionne
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Saddam Hussein has systematically violated, over the course of the past 11 years, every significant UN resolution that has demanded that he disarm and destroy his chemical and biological weapons, and any nuclear capacity. This he has refused to do.
Henry Waxman
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