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You could take Vicodin, step out of the house, onto a freeway, have a truck hit you, and you'd say 'My Bad!'
Bill Engvall
8 Likes
8 Comments
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My wife and I had an argument last week that was so stupid, that it bears repeating. My wife collects twist ties...welcome to my world.
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This guy from L.A. sits down next to me, and he says 'you like baseball?' I said, 'Oh, man, I love baseball.' So he goes 'Did you know that if Jesus had played ball, he'd have been the greatest ball player ever?' Like I'm gonna argue with that logic. So I sat there for a second, and then I said 'did you know that if Babe Ruth had been the Messiah, the Catholics would have beer and hot dogs at Communion?' He left.
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I go 'I just want a cup of black coffee.' She goes 'Do you want to try a biscotti? They're from Italy and they're considered a delicacy.' Have you ever eaten one of these things? It tastes like a burned cookie. Where I'm from, that's considered a mistake.
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