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You spend a much larger part of your life being old, not young.
You pretend to be more eccentric than you actually are because you fear you are an interchangeable cog.
You can't get mad at weather because weather's not about you. Apply that lesson to most other aspects of life.
You can't fake creativity, competence, or sexual arousal.
You can only fall in love six times in your life. Choose wisely.
You can never become rich unless you like rich people.
Workshops and seminars are basically financial speed dating for clueless people.
With Google I'm starting to burn out on knowing the answer to everything. People in the year 2020 are going to be nostalgic for the sensation of feeling clueless.
Where does personality end and brain damage begin?
When you crop the photo, you tell a lie.
When we constantly ask for miracles, we're unraveling the fabric of the world. A world of continuous miracles would not be a world, it would be a cartoon.
When future archaeologists dig up the remains of California, they're going to find all of those gyms their scary-looking gym equipment, and they're going to assume that we were a culture obsessed with torture.
When Donald Duck traded his wings for arms, was he trading up or trading down?
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