TOPIC
AUTHOR
Close
Search
Close
Search
Close
Search
Close
Search
EVENTS
MEMBERS
LOGIN
SIGN UP
Quotes
Topics
Pictures
Questions
Authors
Blog
About
Terms
Privacy
Sitemap
Get in Touch
Advertise
Removal Request
Subscribe
Contact Us
Social
Facebook
Instagram
Twitter
Pinterest
Close
Submit Quote
Latest Quotes
Browse our latest quotes
Topic List
Categorized list of quote topics
Famous Authors
Alphabetical list of influential authors
Picture Quotes
Custom and user added quotes with pictures
Quotes
Questions
Submit Quote
I like the people that I work with, generally. With four exceptions. And I did not become a Lackawanna County volunteer sheriffs deputy to make friends. And by the way, I havent.
Dwight Schrute
3 Likes
3 Comments
RELATED QUOTES
Why tip someone for a job Im capable of doing myself? I can deliver food. I can drive a taxi. I can, and do, cut my own hair. I did however, tip my urologist, because I am unable to pulverize my own kidney stones.
Dwight Schrute
5 Likes
Sponsored Links
Yes I have acted before. I was in a production of Oklahoma! in the 7th grade. I played the part of Mutey the Mailman. They had too many kids so they made up roles like that. I was good.
Dwight Schrute
8 Likes
I come from a long line of fighters. My maternal grandfather was the toughest guy I ever knew. World War Two veteran killed twenty men and spent the rest of the war in an Allied prison camp. My father battled blood pressure and obesity all his life. Different kind of fight.
Dwight Schrute
8 Likes
A 30-year mortgage at Michaels age essentially means that hes buying a coffin. If I were buying my coffin, I would get one with thicker walls so you couldnt hear the other dead people.
Dwight Schrute
4 Likes
Through concentration, I can raise and lower my cholesterol at will.
Dwight Schrute
2 Likes
Sponsored Links
Security in this office park is a joke. Last year I came to work with my spud-gun in a duffel bag. I sat at my desk all day with a rifle that shoots potatoes at 60 pounds per square inch. Can you imagine if I was deranged?
Dwight Schrute
2 Likes
I grew up on a farm. I have seen animals having sex in every position imaginable. Goat on chicken. Chicken on goat. Couple of chickens doing a goat, couple of pigs watching.
Dwight Schrute
6 Likes
The problem, Jim, is that people who are really suffering from a medical condition wont receive the care they need because someone in this office is coming up with ridiculous stuff. Count Choculitis.Why did you write that down, Jim? Is it because you know I love Count Chocula?
Dwight Schrute
3 Likes
I am fast. To give you a reference point I am somewhere between a snake and a mongooseand a panther.
Dwight Schrute
2 Likes
How would I describe myself? Three words: hard working, alpha male, jackhammermercilessinsatiable
Dwight Schrute
7 Likes
Sponsored Links
Would I ever leave this company? Look, Im all about loyalty. In fact, I feel like part of what Im being paid for here is my loyalty. But if there were somewhere else that valued loyalty more highly, Im going wherever they value loyalty the most.
Dwight Schrute
3 Likes
I train my major blood vessels to retract into my body on command. Also, I can retract my penis up into itself.
Dwight Schrute
2 Likes
TRENDING
TRENDING TOPICS
Mar 28
Birthday Wishes
Broken Heart
Confidence
Contemplation
Dance
Gardens
Getting Over Him
Hollywood
I Hate Boys
Illusion
Im Over You
Love
Military Wife
Obscurity
Positive
Prizes
Sad Love
Single Mom
Single Parent
Success
ABOUT
Terms
Privacy Policy
Removal Request
Sitemap
Contact Us
OUR GOAL
Our goal is to help you by delivering amazing quotes to bring inspiration, personal growth, love and happiness to your everyday life.
© 2024 SearchQuotes™