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I haven't had sex in so long I am considering becoming a born again virgin.
Ryan Swain
157 Likes
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Trust your husband, adore your husband, and get as much as you can in your own name.
Joan Rivers
11 Likes
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The four most important words in any marriage...'Ill do the dishes.'
Unknown
10 Likes
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You know its love when you want to keep holding hands even after youre sweaty.
Unknown
28 Likes
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If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married.
Katharine Hepburn
8 Likes
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The only people who make love all the time are liars.
Louis Jordan
25 Likes
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To be in love is merely to be in a state of perceptual anesthesia.
HL Mencken
2 Likes
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Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. Theres too much fraternizing with the enemy.
Henry Kissinger
7 Likes
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I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.
Steve Martin
8 Likes
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Love is the answer, but while youre waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions.
Woody Allen
9 Likes
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The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue of Liberty.
Woody Allen
19 Likes
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Shopping is better than sex. At least if youre not satisfied, you can exchange it for something you really like.
Adrienne Gusoff
14 Likes
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How many people here have telekinetic powers? Raise my hand.
Emo Phillips
13 Likes
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Sometimes, when I feel like nobody understands me, it helps to think of you! Nobody understands you either.
Unknown
23 Likes
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Today I will be happier than a bird with a french fry.
Unknown
19 Likes
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Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?
Will Rogers
16 Likes
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I told my psychiatrist everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous; everyone hasn't met me yet
Rodney Dangerfield
34 Likes
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God writes a lot of comedy-the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny.
Garrison Keillor
16 Likes
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Life is like a cobweb, not an organizational chart.
Ross Perot
8 Likes
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Life is short; talk fast.
Unknown
10 Likes
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