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Does a prostitude file pregnancy as a work-related accident?
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Why is it when you run into a spider web, you suddenly turn into a ninja?
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I just read last year 4,153,237 ppl got married. I don't want to start any trouble, but shouldn't that be an even number?
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Facebook is like a fridge. When you're bored you keep opening and closing it every few minutes to see if there's anything good in it.
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There's a huge difference between haha and hahaha. When you write more than 2 haha's, usually means you're actually laughing at the comment.
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Girls are like cell phones, they like to be held and talked to, but press the wrong button and you're disconnected. Guys are like buses. If you miss that one, another will be along soon.
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Children in the dark cause accidents, accidents in the dark cause children.
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Women are like police, they can have all the evidence in the world but they still want a confession.
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Facebook is the only place where it's acceptable to talk to a wall.
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Facebook is like jail, you sit around and waste time, write on walls, and get poked by people you don't know.
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Grammar is important! Capitalization is the difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse and helping your Uncle jack off a horse.
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