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Douglas Adams Quotes & Sayings
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82 entries tagged including 54 subtopics.
Last updated Apr 2024
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QUOTES
Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.
Douglas Adams
8 Likes
Presidency quotes
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Totally mad. Utter nonsense. But we'll do it because it's brilliant nonsense.
Douglas Adams
3 Likes
Nonsense quotes
Man has always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much...the wheel, New York, wars and so on...while all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man...for precisely the same reason.
Douglas Adams
10 Likes
The mere thought hadn't even begun to speculate about the merest possibility of crossing my mind.
Douglas Adams
2 Likes
Mind quotes
The knack of flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
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4 Likes
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Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.
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6 Likes
Learning quotes
Mankind quotes
It's no coincidence that in no known language does the phrase "As pretty as an airport" appear
Douglas Adams
11 Likes
Language quotes
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I intended to be.
Douglas Adams
4 Likes
Life quotes
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The impossible often has a kind of integrity which the merely improbable lacks.
Douglas Adams
3 Likes
Impossibility quotes
Now it is such a bizarrely improbable coincidence that anything so mind-bog-gglingly useful could have evolved purely by chance that some thinkers have chosen to see it as the final and clinching proof of the non-existence of God. The argument goes something like this: `I refuse to prove that I exist,' says God, `for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing.' `But,' says Man, `The Babel fish is a dead giveaway, isn't it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don't. QED.' `Oh dear,' says God, `I hadn't thought of that,' and promptly vanished in a puff of logic. `Oh, that was easy,' says Man, and for an encore goes on to prove that black is white and gets himself killed on the next zebra crossing.
Douglas Adams
15 Likes
Humor quotes
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The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to get at or repair
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Errors quotes
We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty!
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5 Likes
Doubt quotes
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The difficulty with this conversation is that it's very different from most of the ones I've had of late. Which, as I explained, have mostly been with trees.
Douglas Adams
10 Likes
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There is a theory which states that if ever for any reason anyone discovers what exactly the Universe is for and why it is here it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another that states that this has already happened.
Douglas Adams
21 Likes
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A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.
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3 Likes
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You live and learn. At any rate, you live.
Douglas Adams
2 Likes
We have normality. I repeat, we have normality. Anything you still can't cope with is therefore your own problem.
Douglas Adams
0 Likes
Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so.
Douglas Adams
1 Likes
This must be Thursday. I never could get the hang of Thursdays.
Douglas Adams
22 Likes
There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
Douglas Adams
2 Likes
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