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Peter Griffin Quotes & Sayings
31 entries tagged including 5 subtopics.
Last updated Jun 2020
Peter Griffin Topics
Be careful who you're calling a child, Lois, because if I'm a child, that makes you a pedophile. And I'll be damned if I'm gonna sit here and get lectured by a pervert.
Tv Series quotes
Gays don't vommit. They're a very clean people. And they have been ever since they came to this country from France.
What am I supposed to do with all my great ideas? Put 'em in a tub and clean myself with them? That's what soap is for, Lois.
Dear MacGuyver, Enclosed is a rubber band, a paper clip, and a drinking straw. Please save my dog.
No thanks, that yellow snow cone you gave me didn't taste like lemon, it tasted more like...oh you guys are asses!
Nobody calls me a fizzle and gets away with it! Except for that one guy who called me a fizzle and then ran away, he got away with it. But most of the people who call me a fizzle don't get away with it! Actually he was the only guy to ever call me a fizzle, but after today only half the people who have ever called me a fizzle will have gotten away with it!
Hey Lois, give Chris a break. I mean, no tv? So he failed a class, it's not like he felt up his cousin in the garage that one time when I was 19.
Wait, Lois, we have to handle this delicately. Our son....wants....to plow you.
Oh, I thought you wanted us to murder the children and harvest their organs for beer money.
You know what I haven't had in a while? Big League Chew.
Um, if by ead you mean imagined a naked lady, then, yes.
Hey hey, where the hell is that Peter Griffin? He told me he'd give me a hundred dollars if I took off all my clothes off.
Lois, um, go get the medical dictionary and look up "fork" and "lung."
I'd say, 'Come again?' and I'd laugh as I said, 'Come.'
Oh yeah? Watcha sellin'? Meth, ex, crack, dust, coke, block, crystal????? IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD? I DONT THINK SO!!!!
Hey, that's fantastic, Lois! And I'll pleasure myself to your photos.
Hey Brian! I turned the stairs into a waterslide!
Yep, now here's the plan: You'll enter through the air contitioning duct here. Now there'll be an invisible laser grid three inches from the floor, so you'll have to compress your body to the size of an ordinary household sponge and slide underneath like some kind of weird amphibious dolphin.
Oh god, I hope you're not pregnant, we can't afford another kid. We already got Chris, Stewey, Richie, Joanie, Greg, Marsha, Bobby, Jan, Mike Seaver, Carol Seaver, Boner, Urkel, Mr. Furley...
Stand perfectly still Lois, their vision is based on movement.
Getting Over Someone
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