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Barry Diller Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Barry Diller" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them.
Phyllis Diller
2 Likes
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Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.
Phyllis Diller
5 Likes
Aim high, and you won't shoot your foot off.
Phyllis Diller
7 Likes
If it weren't for baseball, many kids wouldn't know what a millionaire looked like.
Phyllis Diller
1 Likes
A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once
Phyllis Diller
10 Likes
Mistakes quotes
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What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.
Phyllis Diller
9 Likes
Tranquilizers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle - keep away from children.
Phyllis Diller
2 Likes
Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed.
Phyllis Diller
3 Likes
The real reason your pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing at you.
Phyllis Diller
7 Likes
Health - what my friends are always drinking to before they fall down.
Phyllis Diller
10 Likes
Negative Friendship quotes
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A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once
Phyllis Diller
10 Likes
Mistakes quotes
Bachelors quotes
Men quotes
I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about short and cheap?
Phyllis Diller
8 Likes
He has so many muscles he has to make an appointment to move his fingers.
Phyllis Diller
11 Likes
Funny quotes
Putdowns quotes
Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going.
Phyllis Diller
7 Likes
My sister sometimes does a Todd Barry tribute act.
Todd Barry
5 Likes
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The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.
Phyllis Diller
2 Likes
I asked the waiter, 'Is this milk fresh?' He said, 'Lady, three hours ago it was grass.'
Phyllis Diller
3 Likes
Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.
Phyllis Diller
20 Likes
Funny quotes
Marriage quotes
My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.
Phyllis Diller
5 Likes
We were ready to launch Barry White, but the record company wouldn't put it out. Said it wouldn't sell.
Barry White
25 Likes
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