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Faget Jokes Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Faget Jokes" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up, and he said 'You've been promoted.' And I swerved. And then he rang up a second time and said You've been promoted again.' And I swerved again. He rang up a third time and said 'You're managing director.' And I went into a tree. And a policeman came up and said 'What happened to you?' And I said 'I careered off the road.'
Tim Vine
53 Likes
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Why do single women take advice from other single women? That's like Stevie Wonder giving Ray Charles driving directions.
Hussein Nishah
350 Likes
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If you as parents cut corners, your children will too. If you lie, they will too. If you spend all your money on yourselves and tithe no portion of it for charities, colleges, churches, synagogues, and civic causes, your children won't either. And if parents snicker at racial and gender jokes, another generation will pass on the poison adults still have not had the courage to snuff out.
Marian Wright Edelman
16 Likes
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Since today is Valentine's day, I was wondering if you'd like to go back to MySpace, so I can Twitter with your Yahoo, until I Google all over your Facebook and we can Instagram our date... ;) Happy Valentine's Day, Everyone!!
Unknown
495 Likes
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A good wife comes from God and a good husband comes from the bank.
Evans Amecha
51 Likes
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You can't stand when I have my eyes set on someone else, but don't you realize that I go weak when I'm around you. I always laugh and smile at your jokes even when they're not funny. I take every single chance I have to talk to you. You make me melt in many different ways. I'm crazy about you, but would I ever confess this? I don't think I ever will. It's not that I'm scared. It's just that, you'll never feel the same way.
Unknown
192 Likes
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There should be a relationship status for I don't even know whats going on.
Unknown
38 Likes
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For Lent, I'm giving up making jokes about what I'm giving up for Lent.
Unknown
7 Likes
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Christmas brings enormous electric bills. Candles are used for Hanukkah. Not only are we spared enormous electric bills, but we get to feel good about not contributing to the energy crisis.
Unknown
7 Likes
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I guess it's hard to tune in and know what's going on...because there's about 10 storylines going at one time. So if people haven't seen the show and they just jump in and try to watch it's easy to get confused. But at the same time I think it's easy for anyone to tune in and enjoy it. I mean, it's just a really dirty show. There are a lot of dir.. jokes.
Michael Cera
37 Likes
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Don't steal, don't lie, don't cheat, don't sell drugs. The government hates competition.
Hussein Nishah
526 Likes
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Congratulations to Charlie Sheen, who's marrying his longtime girlfriend. I have to say...Charlie Sheen has a longtime girlfriend?
Jimmy Kimmel
7 Likes
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Everyone has a sense of humor. If you don't laugh at jokes, you probably laugh at opinions.
Criss Jami
151 Likes
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So you wanna hear a joke, its not funny so you wont laugh, so there are three tomatoes walking down the street mamma tomato pappa tomato and baby tomato, so baby tomato starts lagging behind and pappa tomato gets mad and goes back and squashes baby tomato and says ketchup.
Pulp Fiction
44 Likes
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What's the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Beer nuts are $1.50 and deer nuts are under a buck.
Anonymous
102 Likes
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An English professor wrote the words, "Woman without her man is nothing" on the blackboard and directed his students to punctuate it correctly. The men wrote: "Woman, without her man, is nothing." The women wrote: "Woman: Without her, man is nothing."
Unknown
1496 Likes
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Food, love, career, and mother, the four major guilt groups.
Unknown
32 Likes
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I wish I had never met you. There would be no need to impress you. No need to want you. No need for loving you. No need for crying over you. No need for heartbreaks. No need for pain or tears. No need for forgotten promises. No need for rejected hugs. No need for crying myself to sleep. No need for everything you've done to make me feel like nothing. But then again, I'm glad I met you. Cause you were the one who always asked me if anything was wrong. You were the one who loved me for me. You were the one who care when everyone else didnt. The one who stayed up late to talk about the craziest things. The one who taught me new things. The one who laughed at my bad jokes. The one who did things, just for me.
Unknown
342 Likes
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Truth is your the best friend someone can ask for. It feels like I've known you forever. You've always knew how to cheer me up when I'm down. I'll always remember the times we laughed so hard, we couldnt stop. The memories, the fun, the moments, the laughs, the jokes and all the times we got busted, I'll never forget them. I know we fought and argued sometimes but that only made our friendship stronger. As long as we are living, no matter when or where, if you ever need me just call and I'll be there because you've been there for me. Of all the friends I've ever met, you're the one I won't forget.
Mahmoud El Hallab
2115 Likes
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In high school, there are so many cliques. You're never safe. In between my junior and senior years, I went away to film Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, and I came back ready to do the things with my friends that we always did, but things change. People get older, and there are some inside jokes that you don't know about that have happened. You feel lost for a while, and it's hard to come back from that. Then the friends who have 'replaced' you are territorial. I've experienced that a little bit. There are catty, insecure, and gossipy girls everywhere, but for me, I don't think it's a matter of any of them being genuinely bad at heart. I just think that maybe the different ways in which people are raised make them different and insecure. They point out the bad things in others just to make themselves feel better. It's everywhere.
Blake Lively
14 Likes
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