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When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks, "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here?
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The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. But not in that order...
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They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer.
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Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills. Making the last car payment.
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When your dreams turn to dust, it's time to vacuum.
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I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
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I don't suffer from stress. I'm a carrier.
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An consultant is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.
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If it were not for Thomas Edison, we would all be watching television in the dark.
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It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world everyday always just exactly fits the newspaper.
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