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Police in Wisconsin are searching for three men who stole $24,000 dollars worth of Miller beer. $24,000 dollars worth of Miller? Did they steal all of it?
Seth Meyers
6 Likes
6 Comments
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It was reported this week that Luciano Pavarotti lip-synched his final performance at the 2006 Torino Winter Olympics because the bitter cold made it impossible for him to sing. Many spectators grew suspicious when midway through the song, Pavarotti ate a turkey sub.
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Two volunteer groups in Arizona have set up cameras on the Mexican border, so that people with fast internet connections can sign up to monitor the cameras remotely and report illegal immigrants. Said one illegal immigrant, 'Hey, free camera!'
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In anticipation of Pope Benedict's trip to New York next week, t-shirts, mugs, posters and Pope bobblehead dolls are going on sale all over the city. After all, the pope deserves the same respect and admiration that we bestow upon 'Scarface.'
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The death Saturday of actor Charlton Heston has elicited tributes from many quarters including Nancy Reagan who called him 'an American hero,' President Bush, who described him as an 'advocate for liberty,' and apes, who called him 'Public Enemy 1.
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Surgeons from Johns Hopkins University Hospital successfully performed the first-ever 6-way kidney transplant last Saturday. Disturbingly, all 6 patients had only gone in for flu shots.
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Although many in Chicago were disappointed, with the decision of the International Olympic Committee, Cubs fans took the news best as they're used to hearing the phrase'Chicago has been eliminated.'
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According to researchers a type of fat that accumulates around the hips and bottom may actually offer some protection against diabetes. Though it more than triples you chance of contracting Sir Mix-A-Lot.
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New York's Edward Cardinal Egan celebrated Mass at St. Patrick's Cathedral on Sunday wearing a new golden robe given to him by Pope Benedict. So, looks like it's getting pretty serious.
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Hillary Andrews, a former Weather Channel anchorwoman, has won a sexual-harassment claim against Bob Stokes, her male co-anchor, whom she accused of repeatedly asking her about her sex life and making crude remarks such as 'Will you lick my swizzle stick?'
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Astronauts living on the International Space Station will soon be getting their drinking water from a new system that recycles their urine into drinkable water. Said one Space Station astronaut, 'It would have been nice to get a heads-up on that before we got here.
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An online auction to benefit the Robert F. Kennedy Memorial, a human rights advocacy group, is selling tea with Alan Greenspan for 11,000 dollars. Or, for twelve thousand, you can have the tea alone.
Seth Meyers
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