TOPIC
AUTHOR
Close
Search
Close
Search
Close
Search
Close
Search
EVENTS
MEMBERS
LOGIN
SIGN UP
Quotes
Topics
Pictures
Questions
Authors
Blog
About
Terms
Privacy
Sitemap
Get in Touch
Advertise
Removal Request
Subscribe
Contact Us
Social
Facebook
Instagram
Twitter
Pinterest
Close
Submit Quote
Latest Quotes
Browse our latest quotes
Topic List
Categorized list of quote topics
Famous Authors
Alphabetical list of influential authors
Picture Quotes
Custom and user added quotes with pictures
Quotes
Questions
Submit Quote
George Carlin Funny Quotes
click me
18 entries tagged Funny quotes by George Carlin.
Last updated May 2024
George Carlin Topics
God
Driving
Moon
Addiction
Advertising
Animals
Children
Death And Dying
Possibility
Authority
Baseball
Humor
Euphemism
Christian
Alcohol
Libraries
Family
Memory
Mothers
Reason
Show more
Singers And Singing
Self-esteem
Solution
Trade
Restaurants
Separation
Funny Catholic
Movies
Electricity
Funny
Weather
Life
Religion
Drink
Truth
Smile
Women
Politics
Money
Nations
Desperation
Thinking
Free Thinking
Independence
Death
Belief
Controversy
Drugs
Humanity
QUOTES
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim.
George Carlin
21 Likes
Friendship quotes
Funny quotes
Sponsored Links
Were having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, were having a swan. You get more stuffing.
George Carlin
4 Likes
Funny quotes
Thanksgiving quotes
We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we're having a swan. You get more stuffing.
George Carlin
2 Likes
Funny quotes
Thanksgiving quotes
Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong.
George Carlin
41 Likes
Funny quotes
Sleep quotes
Camping quotes
Marry an orphan: you'll never have to spend boring holidays with the in-laws.
George Carlin
25 Likes
Funny quotes
Holiday quotes
Famous Holiday quotes
Sponsored Links
I put a dollar in one of those change machines. Nothing changed.
George Carlin
16 Likes
Funny quotes
Change quotes
Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink, I think female alcoholics should be told not to fu..
George Carlin
61 Likes
Humor quotes
Funny quotes
Alcohol quotes
Women quotes
Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac
George Carlin
24 Likes
Funny quotes
Driving quotes
Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who would be willing to test any drug they could come up with
George Carlin
12 Likes
Funny quotes
Drugs quotes
Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who would be willing to test any drug they could come up with
George Carlin
2 Likes
Drugs quotes
Funny quotes
Sponsored Links
I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me - they're cramming for their final exam.
George Carlin
280 Likes
Christian quotes
Funny quotes
Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who would be willing to test any drug they could come up with
George Carlin
27 Likes
Drugs quotes
Funny quotes
Controversy quotes
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
George Carlin
9 Likes
Funny quotes
Drink quotes
The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life.
George Carlin
20 Likes
Funny quotes
Life quotes
What does it mean to pre-board? Do you get on before you get on?
George Carlin
20 Likes
Funny quotes
Sponsored Links
Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
George Carlin
145 Likes
Funny quotes
Weather quotes
In comic strips, the person on the left always speaks first.
George Carlin
10 Likes
Funny quotes
Electricity is really just organized lightning.
George Carlin
28 Likes
Funny quotes
Electricity quotes
1
TRENDING
TRENDING TOPICS
May 09
Ability
Annoyed
Authority
Bored
Christmas
Dancing
Discovery
Faith
Family Love
Fortune
Funny
Greetings
Happiness
Incompetence
Life
Love
Motivational
Philosophical
Thank You
Virginity
ABOUT
Terms
Privacy Policy
Removal Request
Sitemap
Contact Us
OUR GOAL
Our goal is to help you by delivering amazing quotes to bring inspiration, personal growth, love and happiness to your everyday life.
© 2024 SearchQuotes™