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I don't go tanning tanning anymore because Obama put a 10% tax on tanning. I feel like he did that intentionally for us, like McCain would never put a 10% tax on tanning.. because he is pale and he would probably wanna be tanned.
I don't eat friggin' lobster or anything like that. Because they're alive when you kill it.
You look at me you think I'm like a stuck up bi..., but yet, like, veterinarian, like that's my soul, like I fu..in' like, save animals, like that's what I do.
I hate guys. I'm turning lesbian. I swear.
This are the 3 things I think Im addicted to: Bronzer, Boys & Alcohol.
I don't wanna be friends with you ever again cause you're a fu..ing jerkoff.
I swear on my cat's grave.
You haven't see nothing yet till' you see me at the JERSEY fu..ING SHORE! Seeya later mum!
Lol so I'm the asshole in the bathroom that can't get the motion censored water and soap to come out and waving my hand for 5 minutes.
I call my vibrator the Elmo, because you know like tickle me Elmo
Seriously like who pee's in a bar?
Even though we're tiny bi...es I don't give a sh... I will fu..ing attack you like a squirrel monkey.
I will pee in a bush, I will sh.. in a bush, I will hide in a bush.
Being Cheated On
Death And Dying
Funny Facebook Status
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