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In LA green doesn't mean go. It means wait for all the other cars to quit running the red light...then go.
Just lost on Words with Friends, I am way to close to menstruating to handle this properly.
I just paid $6 to park in a parking structure, to go to Subway to get a $5 sandwich. I miss Oregon and huge parking lots.
Off to a Clippers game! I'll embarrass everyone around me by yelling, good dribbling, and yay go make that shot in the basketball hoop!
Yes, slippers that heat up and keep your feet warm sound nice. But because you called them, hot booties.....oh hellllllllllllll noooooooo!
Did you know you can have good eyelash hair days and bad eyelash hair days? It's true. Just ask, me.
I would never have this body if it wasn't for yoga, Barry's bootcamp and Oreos, so thank you all for that.
I am so sick of my bangs, but I don't think after 28 years I can part with them. Hahaha, 'part' with them, ahahaha, get it?!?!?
Sometimes you eat the bar, and sometimes the bar eats you, dude.
Clothes are annoying.
Sex in the Stone Age? Okay National Geographic, I'm intrigued.
Sooooo, say your cat accidentally ate one of your birth control pills. He'd be fine right? Yeaaaah. Oopsies.
Somebody start talking about politics so I can fall back asleep...
Believe In Yourself
Better Off Without You
I Dont Give A Fuck
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