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You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
Paintings are like a beer, only beer tastes good and it's hard to stop drinking beer.
You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.
We're basically after Joe's beer money, and Joe likes his beer, so you better make sure that what you give him is at least as pleasurable to him as having his six-pack of beer would be.
A guy sitting with his girlfriend, drinking beer says, "I love you". Girl asks "Is it you or the beer talking?". Boy replies, "Its me. Talking to my beer."
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Homer: Oh, I'll never drink another beer in my life.Vendor: BEER HERE! I GOT BEER!Homer: OOH, I'll take ten!
Mmmmmmm. donuts/beer/erotic cakes.
Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
The mouth of a perfectly happy man is filled with beer.
God has a brown voice, as soft and full as beer.
I'm gonna drink lots of beer and stay out all night.
Put it back in the horse! [on tasting his first American beer].
H Allen Smith
You can do anything with beer that you can do with wine. Beer is great for basting or marinating meat and fish.
Sad Break Up
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