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Eric Cartman Quotes & Sayings
31 entries tagged including 3 subtopics.
Last updated May 2020
Eric Cartman Topics
Its an Afghanistan goat, so it cant stay here, or else itll choke on the sweet air of freedom.
Hippies.Theyre everywhere. They wanna save the earth, but all they do is smoke pot and smell bad.
Bitch! Dont call me bitch, bitch!
Now stop wasting Mel Gibsons time, you little pussy prick.
Heaven could be like the pixie fairies of Bubblegum Forest. You only see them if you really believe in them.
Alright. Look. I didnt want to have to say this, but I think maybe were not seeing heaven because one of us doesnt believe in it enough.
I hate hippies! I mean, the way they always talk about protectin the earth and then drive around in cars that get poor gas mileage and wear those stupid bracelets I hate em! I wanna kick em in the nuts!
Speaking of pounding ass, here comes Stans little homo dog.
Token, how many times do we have to go over this? Youre black. You can play the bass.
You have rats in your house, too, Kenny? Seriously, you better stop being so poor or else Im gonna start huckin rocks at you.
Well, I looked in my moms closet and saw what I was getting for Christmas, an UltraVibe Pleasure 2000.
Well, Ive been lickin this carpet for 3 whole hours and I dont feel like a lesbian.
Im just saying youre just a little wuss, thats all.
If some girl tried to kick my ass, Id be like, Hey. Why dont you stop dressing me like a mailman uh, and making me dance for you...while you go and smoke crack in your bedroom and have sex with some guy I dont even know. On my dads bed.
No, they dont, you jealous weakling. Passing Man: God damn, thats a big fat ass.
A bunch of fat old skanks on their periods
The poor kid passes it to the Jew, the Jew shoots. He misses! Proving once and for all that Jews cannot play hockey!
Respect My Authority!
Butters will give hand jobs in the corner for a dollar. Butters: Sure! Im good at all kinds of jobs.
Handle it? For two billion dollars I could handle my Grandpas balls dude.
I Hate Boys
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