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My neighborhood is so bad. This is how we have to order at the drive-thru if we wanna stay alive...
I got a little bit o black in me. I didnt get that big di.. though...I got bad credit, aint that a bi...?
If you can take a di.. in the ass, you can DAMN sure take a joke!
I was sweating like R. Kelly at the Kids Choice Awards.
Last Comic Standing was a great opportunity and it was a great learning experience. Even though I didn't win, I've had more success than the actual winner.
I loved Celebrity Fit Club. Celebrity Fit Club had a lot of heart especially if people go into it with a positive attitude like I did, like this is going to be a positive experience. I made a lot of head way in my life and for that I got a lot of people who respect me for what I did on that show.
My wife is also a standup comic, so it's something for me that's awesome. She's a beautiful girl. I really married above my level. She was with me when I was a lot heavier and a lot broker and when you have that type of thing in your life you can do anything you're given.
I hate comics that try to change the world. That's not my job. That's for the king. I'm the jester. I'm there to make you laugh.
I have a lot of pride in the fact that I don't do a lot of fat material. I give people who are overweight a positive role model that their whole life doesn't have to be fixated on that.
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