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No one dies a virgin, Life screws us all.
As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two...
Some say the glass is half empty, some say the glass is half full, I say, are you going to drink that?
Cheaters never prosper, unless they get away with it.
Am I getting smart with you? How would you know?
Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.
Men do not like to admit to even momentary imperfection. My husband forgot the code to turn off the alarm. When the police came, he wouldn't admit he'd forgotten the code...he turned himself in.
You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.
There is nothing so annoying as having two people talking when you're busy interrupting.
Sometimes my mind wanders; other times it leaves completely.
If the minimum wasn't acceptable it wouldn't be called the minimum.
Men who don't understand women fall into two groups: Bachelors and Husbands.
The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest.
Things Happen For A Reason
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