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At times I feel that waiting for the right person in life is like waiting for boat at the airport.
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131 Likes
Witty Facebook Status quotes
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My alarm clock & I had a fight. It wanted me to get up, I refused. Things escalated. Now I'm awake & its broken. Not sure who won the fight.
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90 Likes
Witty Facebook Status quotes
Who decided that paper beats rock? Have someone hold up a sheet of paper in front of their face, then throw a rock at it. Who wins?
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137 Likes
Witty Facebook Status quotes
A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don't need it.
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75 Likes
Witty Facebook Status quotes
Dear Pringles, Now that I am no longer a child, I can no longer fit my hand inside your tube of deliciousness. Work on that.
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181 Likes
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Try to say the letter 'M' without your lips touching.
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123 Likes
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To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
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75 Likes
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Plagiarism quotes
Why is the place you drive on is a parkway, and the place you park on is the driveway?
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45 Likes
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As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.
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80 Likes
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Advice for the day: If you have a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: Take two, and KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN.
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128 Likes
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Books have knowledge, knowledge is power, power corrupts, corruption is a crime, and crime doesn't pay..so if you keep reading, you'll go broke.
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38 Likes
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A single death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistic.
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37 Likes
Witty Facebook Status quotes
Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
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1536 Likes
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Knowledge is realizing that the street is one-way, wisdom is looking both directions anyway.
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536 Likes
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You can't be late until you show up.
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411 Likes
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A train station is where the train stops. A bus station is where the bus stops. On my desk, I have a work station...
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53 Likes
Witty Facebook Status quotes
If pro is opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress?
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75 Likes
Witty Facebook Status quotes
Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a minute, but set him on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
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56 Likes
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The real trouble with reality is that there's no background music.
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960 Likes
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I once prayed to god for a bike, but quickly found out he didnt work that way...so I stole a bike and prayed for his forgiveness.
Unknown
84 Likes
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