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Andy Rooney Quotes & Sayings
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48 entries tagged including 29 subtopics.
Last updated Apr 2024
Andy Rooney Topics
Funny
Teachers
Great Christmas
Best Christmas
Irony
Dieting
Books
Politicians
Patriotism
Native Americans
Hunting
Cute Dog
News
God
Life
Food
Money
Computers
Television
Truth
Show more
Appearance
Government
Democrats
Women
Smiling
Smile
Happiness
Beautiful Christmas
QUOTES
Most of us end up with no more than five or six people who remember us. Teachers have thousands of people who remember them for the rest of their lives.
Andy Rooney
27 Likes
Teachers quotes
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Making duplicate copies and computer printouts of things no one wanted even one of in the first place is giving America a new sense of purpose.
Andy Rooney
1 Likes
If dogs could talk it would take a lot of the fun out of owning one.
Andy Rooney
2 Likes
I like ice hockey, but it's a frustrating game to watch. It's hard to keep your eyes on both the puck and the players and too much time passes between scoring in hockey. There are usually more fights than there are points.
Andy Rooney
4 Likes
I just wish we knew a little less about his urethra and a little more about his arms sales to Iran.
Andy Rooney
3 Likes
Sponsored Links
I hope all of you are going to fill out your census form when it comes in the mail next month. If you don't return the form the area you live in might get less government money and you wouldn't want that to happen, would you.
Andy Rooney
4 Likes
I don't think the government is out to get me or help someone else get me but it wouldn't surprise me if they were out to sell me something or help someone else sell me something. I mean, why else would the Census Bureau want to know my telephone number?
Andy Rooney
3 Likes
I don't pick subjects as much as they pick me.
Andy Rooney
2 Likes
I didn't get old on purpose, it just happened. If you're lucky, it could happen to you.
Andy Rooney
6 Likes
Figure skating is an unlikely Olympic event but its good television. It's sort of a combination of gymnastics and ballet. A little s..y too which doesn't hurt.
Andy Rooney
6 Likes
Sponsored Links
Elephants and grandchildren never forget.
Andy Rooney
7 Likes
Don't rule out working with your hands. It does not preclude using your head.
Andy Rooney
8 Likes
Death is a distant rumor to the young.
Andy Rooney
3 Likes
As an old reporter, we have a few secrets, and the first thing is we try the phone book.
Andy Rooney
1 Likes
Anyone who watches golf on television would enjoy watching the grass grow on the greens.
Andy Rooney
3 Likes
Sponsored Links
All men are not created equal but should be treated as though they were under the law.
Andy Rooney
4 Likes
When a politician mentions God half a dozen times in a speech, it's to appropriate for his campaign the name God. He's suggesting that God has endorsed the ticket and given permission to have His name used in promotional material in exchange for certain considerations, like school prayer. There are lots of cheap tricks used in political campaigns, and evoking God's name is one of them.
Andy Rooney
15 Likes
God quotes
I don't like food that's too carefully arranged; it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I'd buy a painting.
Andy Rooney
21 Likes
Food quotes
Funny quotes
Because over the past few years, more money has been spent on breast implants and Viagra than is spent on Alzheimer's Disease research, it is believed that by the year 2030 there will be a large number of people wandering around with huge breasts an.
Andy Rooney
8 Likes
Money quotes
Computers may save time but they sure waste a lot of paper. About 98 percent of everything printed out by a computer is garbage that no one ever reads.
Andy Rooney
24 Likes
Computers quotes
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