How do you remind someone to do something when you know the mere act of asking is going to offend him? The all-time best technique is to tell the person you don't mind if he does it. For instance, let's say that you're in a deli and the person behind the counter is not wearing gloves. He's handling money and wiping up the floor. Now he's about to make your sandwich. Asking him to please put the gloves on shouldn't be offensive, but if you are concerned about his taking offense you should merely say, ''Oh, you don't need to put gloves on if you don't want to.'' In which case he will probably put them on, as he wasn't ''told to,'' but he knows that he is supposed to. This is also similar to why flight attendants will ask you to ''take your seat'' rather than telling you to ''sit down.'' Asking you to take your seat doesn't make you defensive, as the request puts you in charge - you are going to take your seat. Telling you to sit down puts her in charge. (1/2 1-AF)