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QUOTES
Don't waste your life living in a $100,000 apartment when you can live under a $15 million dollar bridge.
Nikhil Saluja
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Million dollar idea: A smart phone that doesn't receive phone calls.
Nikhil Saluja
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I surveyed 100 women and asked them what shampoo they used when showering, 98 of them said: How the hell did you get in here?
Nikhil Saluja
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Organization is for people who are too lazy to look for their stuff.
Nikhil Saluja
16 Likes
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If you have a son, you only have to worry about one penis. If you have a daughter, you have to worry about every penis in the world...
Nikhil Saluja
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I showed my therapist some of my tweets and now she's seeing a therapist.
Nikhil Saluja
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If I follow you, don't tweet about your boyfriend because I'm your boyfriend until further notice.
Nikhil Saluja
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Not all bitches are women.
Nikhil Saluja
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I'm bored. Maybe I should leave the house and check twitter from somewhere else.
Nikhil Saluja
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The people who want to stay in your life will always find a way.
Nikhil Saluja
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Mom, I'm 16 now. Can I have a Bra? No, John.
Nikhil Saluja
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I live like I type...fast and with tons of mistakes.
Nikhil Saluja
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Wives are funny creatures. They don`t have sex with their husbands for weeks and then they want to kill the woman who does.
Nikhil Saluja
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I just learned today that bacteria is not the back door of a cafeteria.
Nikhil Saluja
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I'm the kind of friend who will help you hide a dead body, but if you betray me, just remember: I know how to hide a dead body.
Nikhil Saluja
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He is indebted to his memory for his jests and to his imagination for his facts.
Nikhil Saluja
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I really miss flip phones because at the end of a conversation you could always dramatically close them like bitch whatever.
Nikhil Saluja
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*Follows Dreams* *Wait for few hours* *Dreams dont follow back* *Unfollows dreams*
Nikhil Saluja
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Tip: Speak English. Kiss French. Drive German. Dress Italian. Spend Arab. Party Caribbean.
Nikhil Saluja
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It's so weird to think that before Twitter, all of this nonsense just stayed in people's heads.
Nikhil Saluja
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